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We are born with confident, competent hearts. We believe we can do things. We yearn to do them. Until we are told we cannot. We believe we can befriend our neighbors, until we are told “they are not our kind of people.” We believe we can love who we want to love, until we are told “that is frowned upon.” We believe we can do things the right way, until we are told “that’s not good for business.” We are born so amazing, so strong and yet so fragile at the same time. I’d say it’s heartbreaking, but that’s too passive of a sentence. Our hearts get broken by the very people, systems, workplaces, and institutions we put our trust in.
As a kid in Catholic school, I was taught that I’d been born with Original Sin. Meaning I was fucked from day one. Born into debt that could only be paid off if I followed their creed up to the day I was put in the ground. I was terrified. So I listened. But I failed. I failed to see how a history of violence brought me closer to a state of grace. I failed to see how a history of misogyny brought me closer to a state of grace. I failed to see how a history of colonization brought me closer to a state of grace. I failed to see how a history of raping children brought me closer to a state of grace. So I left. Leaving the corporate world was easier than leaving the church. Once you can picture a world without hell, it is easy to picture a world without performance reviews. We give our hearts to people and places that do not deserve them. We should stop, because there are people and places that do deserve them. And we should fill each other’s homes with drawings and love letters. We are born with whole hearts. We are born with hearts that ache with possibility. We are born with curious, loving, accepting hearts. These weren’t lost, they were taken from us. We can be who we were meant to be again. Fix your hearts. • |